The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
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