This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
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