what if every blade of grass was a penis?
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
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