so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
Randomize