you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Randomize
