kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
I need water and some morals
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Randomize