I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
Randomize
