You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
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