all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
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