She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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