you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize
