Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So much Jack, so little girl.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize