Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
