Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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