I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
farters have to be the big spoon...
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize
