the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
Contemplating These 27 Questions Will Make Your Brain Explode
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
25 People Confess The Most Shocking Things They’ve Ever Seen In Public
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better