drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Randomize
