all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
Randomize