If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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