i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
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