saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
Randomize
