As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
Randomize
