We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
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