this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
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