chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
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