I need help removing her.
My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
Randomize
