Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
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