explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
Randomize