well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
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