She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
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