I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
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