1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
Randomize
