Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
areolas are like halos for boobs.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Randomize