It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
Randomize
