He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
