he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
Randomize
