what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
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