so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
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