Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
Randomize
