We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
Randomize
