ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
She kept calling me her DD, which I assumed meant designated driver, so I was confused because I don't even have a car. Found out later it means designated dick. It's what her and her friends use as code for the guy they want to hook up with at the end of the night. I feel so used.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize
