My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
Randomize
