who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
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