Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
Randomize
