just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
There was a selfie of you in the dark pointing at the camera with a duck face. You sent it to my 60 year old mother with the caption "you behave"
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
