apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
Randomize
