I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize