I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
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