You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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