Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
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