I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize